On Thursday morning–
Colson is getting his tonsils out.
And yesterday–
My worry came out.
It’s not that I think the surgery is a big deal.
It’s just that my love for this kiddo is a big deal.
Time for post a from the archives,
And a prayer that God will empty the fear,
And replace it with Him.
“Heart regular rhythm without a murmur or gallop…”
As a child, I would listen to my dad, a family doctor,
dictate charts…slowly memorizing a whole list of
ailments-I-don’t-currently-have-but-could-get-someday.
Add in 5 children and a husband–
and I can come up with many hypothetically tragic scenarios to consume hours of worry-filled energy.
My mom had a blood clot in her leg–
I immediately began feeling pain in one of mine.
Our daughter complained of stomach pain–
I was sure her appendix was about to rupture.
It didn’t help that our 4th child’s symptoms were a reality.
After months of reassurances…
We learned that Selah had the disease Pompe–
Which she eventually died from in April 2008.
In some ways, that led to a healthy perspective–
On the other hand–it only amplified my tendency to–
Worry.
Fear.
It is such a struggle for me.
But I’m thankful for the battle–
Because it keeps me coming back to God, clinging to Him, focusing my mind and heart on what I know is True.
So how do I battle the worry?
1. I call it sin.
In my worry, I’m doubting who God is, His control over all things.
I’m forgetting His unfailing love.
I ask Him to help me– Take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ. ~2 Cor. 10:5
because worrying means that we do not think
that God can look after the details of our lives,
and it is never anything else that worries us.
2. I cling to my worry-verses.
When I am afraid, I will put my trust in You. ~Psalm 56:3
Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray. ~James 5:13
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer
and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. ~Philippians 4: 5 and 6
3. I stay in the present.
God promises strength for the current….not the anticipated.
Do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. ~Matthew 6:34
4. I choose to believe.
I will believe who God is.
I will believe that His love is faithful.
I will believe that His plan, what He allows, is best.
And I will pray– I believe, help my unbelief. ~Mark 9:24
5. I pray thankfulness.
With His help, I give thanks.
With His help, I remember–
That if my hope is not in Him,
I’m clinging to an idol.
6. I remember that little eyes are watching.
A huge motivator.
I want to live out– Cast all your anxieties on Him, because He cares for you. ~1 Peter 5:7
7. I think about Heaven.
This is not the end.
I know Heaven is real.
And that changes everything.
My battle with worry is never really over.
It’s a constant struggle.
But when I start to sink into a swirling pit of fear,
I want to face and fight the battle–
With Him and through Him.
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