Trusting Him With Your Everything…

 

I’m rewriting this post.
I wrote it several weeks ago when I joined MaryDeMuth’s blog tour  for her recently released book– Everything.  It has been a JOY to be part of the Everything Launch Team!

Let me just start by saying– the book is incredible.

Worth reading…and you know me…I don’t recommend anything unless it’s something I would buy for you all if I could.
I had a whole post ready with all these amazing quotes that I thought would make you want to read Mary’s book.
And I want you to read it…
Because it’s so worth reading.

And then Julia.

Mary was on a mission trip to Haiti and when her daughter Julia was hospitalized

“We wait until this morning to consult with the pediatric neurologist. She has had a constant, painful headache. And her body just doesn’t obey her right.  I’m writing this from a darkened hospital room, eyes dry and bloodshot, heart heavy. I don’t write this to garner sympathy. The only reason I write this is to ask you to pray for us. Julia’s been scared, lots of tears, understandably so.”

And I realized in that moment…
That Mary was experiencing my–

Everything

That thing you hold on to…and are afraid to place in His hands.
That drawer that you don’t want to open because it still feels too scary to uncurl your fingers and in trust, place the precious contents into His.

What is your Everything?
What is it that you struggle to trust Him with?

For me…
It’s the safety of our children.
We’ve been down that road before and we’ve seen Him faithful.
And that gives me huge hope and curbs my fear whenever I imagine impending possibilities.
But it’s still a battle between worry and trust that wages on within me.

To think back and remember how it was in those days after our Selah died.
Those days when there was nothing else to cling to, but Him.
And He was enough.
Solid-rock-enough-ness that doesn’t even make sense when I think back on it.

So when I received Mary’s email…
Her daughter hospitalized, very sick, so many questions, no answers coming…it took me back to our wrestling days.
And I waited to see.

What would she do with Everything now?
Because for me, that’s where the paint is either tacky or fully cured.
When it moves past just words and hits that deep core place of reality…

When a one-so-loved is the fish and bread you’re asked to offer.

Mary’s prayer in the midst of the scary:

“I give You Julia. You love her far more than I do, and You know what’s wrong. I rest in Your sovereign timing of a diagnosis, and even if we never figure this out, I choose to praise you in this moment. But my mother’s heart is to know what is hurting her. Please, Jesus, show the doctors what in the world is wrong. Or just plain heal her.

…I give You me. Me who is beyond worried and tired and over it. I need rest. I need You. I need perspective. I need Your eyes upon me, Your grace holding my trembling hand, Your power overwhelming my weakness.”

And that is why I decided to change this post.
There is SO much good in this book, Everything.
It’s been one of the most impacting books of the year for me.
But I went a bit quiet and waited to see how she would respond in the midst of this request–
To trust God,
Even with the life of her child.

And it wasn’t that she pretended it was easy.
Actually, that’s one thing I really like about her.
But at the end of it all, even with more questions than answers lingering,
These were her words–

“And thanks to Jesus who helped us walk through it. There were times when I truly, fully LOST IT. In those time I felt entirely needy and small. And sometimes I felt ashamed for being so darn weak.
I realized just how frail and tentative my faith can be, how dependent I am on Jesus and not my own small strength. At one point, Julia and I were both crying. As I held her, I felt the deepest peace, even in the weeping. He broke through. He hangs out in hospital rooms. I’m grateful.”  ~Mary DeMuth

And for me that’s where the words in this book take root–
When life hurts.
And fear is real.
And your heart is breaking.
When worry is banging on your door.

And you still are willing to uncurl your fingers because you know who He is.
You trust who God is.
And you know He is trust-able.
No pretense of pain erased.
But just a clinging to Him in the midst of the confusion and heartache.

Knowing that control,
Is really outside of our control,
But that there is safety and strength in leaning-in-close to Him and saying…
I trust you with my Everything.

Trust in Him at all times…
Pour out your heart before Him;
God is a refuge for us.
~Psalm 62:8

 

***If you’re considering purchasing Everything, you can find it here.  It would make a great Christmas gift and I know it’d be a blessing to Mary, especially since all of this with Julie happened right during the release of the book and she wasn’t able to share as she normally would have.
And finally, here are a  few downloadable-printable-freebies from Mary, for you…

What is the Gospel
The Worry Wart Prayer
What Jesus Provide Us With
Everything Study Guide (with questions for each chapter)

 

*A special thanks to our Everything Launch Team and those who created the beautiful #Everything images.

*And a quick update from Mary.  Julia attempted to go back to school this morning (10/22) but didn’t even make it through first period.
They are heading back to the doctors…please pray for answers and healing and strength. 

 

 

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Comments

  1. I prayed for Mary’s daughter, and thought the same thing. Lord, continue to help her hand over everything. When it involves our children, that is where the rubber meets the road–for me anyway.

  2. Catherine V. says:

    This is beautiful, K. So timely. Thank you.

  3. Oh, wow, just beautiful. Thank you, Kara.

  4. I love your heart, Kara. So blessed to have you in my life!

  5. Kara, your heart belongs to Him. How beautiful to witness your testimony…we shall overcome “by the blood of the Lamb and the word of our testimony.” Rev.12:11

  6. Love this, Kara. I just started reading the book last week… taking my time with it, so I can savor every nugget of truth in there.

    • I was the same way Elizabeth…just slowly reading through, underlining…I appreciate when authors don’t over-simplify the “hard words”…the truths that are easy to flippantly throw out there, but that often require a lot of wrestling to fully accept and take in. I know you live with day-to-day placing it back in His hands…I hope the book will be an encouragement to you. Thanks so much for your help sharing… Love, K

  7. Bless you dear friend. What a precious journey to read through Everything with you!!

  8. Kara, thank you for sharing your heart…you do it so well. I have my own “everything” and you remind me Who to trust with it…Thank you!

  9. This is beautiful, Kara. I look forward to meeting you at Allume.

  10. Wow, Kara. Thank you for sharing your honest journey here. Blessed by it.

  11. What a great post, Kara. I completely agree. Trusting God with our children is often so scary. I think God will use Mary’s honest reactions and trust as an incredible example of how He is our everything.

    • I so agree…it’s not about pretending it isn’t hard…that your heart isn’t breaking…but it’s where you turn in the middle of the pain. She’s been an example to me… thank you for these kind words Tammy. Love, K

  12. Barb Spencer says:

    Thank you so much for this, Kara. I so needed this today…especially today. Thanks for being open to God’s leading. Bless you, friend.

  13. Last night we were singing “All I need is You, Jesus” at church and this is exactly what I was thinking of…All I need is Him-and that means trusting Him with my family.

    • For me…they are the most difficult to place back in His hands…those I love. It comes back to…do I really believe that everything that touches our crew is sifted through His fingers? But–how hard it is when you love them so much. I have to remind myself over and over of His love for them.
      You hit on what’s pulled me through though…music.
      When I couldn’t say the words and was faltering…it was songs like that one you shared above that pulled my heart close to Him. I’m thankful for you Mary Beth…

  14. Can’t wait to read this book!!! Thanks for sharing!

  15. Beautiful, Kara. This gave me goosebumps and sets me back on my knees again. God is faithful… He knows….

  16. Made me cry. Thank you. I often feel quite small and lethargic in this new normal, so it’s good to know my heart for Jesus comes through.

  17. Kara…
    This is my favorite Everything post of all time. Ever. Thank you for trusting us with your hurt. Thank you for posting this!

    So glad I was on the team with you!
    ~Heidi

  18. Living Waters by LeAnn says:

    Thank you for a very deep heartfelt post. He is our everything and I do trust in Him. I know He loves us all and feels our pain. I have gone through similar moments with a granddaughter. I know He hears and answers prayers. All will be well. This was a lovely post.
    Blessings to you all.

  19. Denise Oldham says:

    Such a heart touching post, bless you.

  20. Dianewbailey says:

    (tears) I can barely type…You have blessed me with you story of trusting Him. Thankyou.

  21. Ugochi Jolomi says:

    This is a very impacting post, calls for sober reflections. Thanks for sharing. Visiting and following from Titus Tuesdays, have a super blessed day!
    Love

  22. Ro elliott says:

    Because for me, that’s where the paint is either tacky or fully cured….I love this line…and we need Him to make us fully cured…these times of fire and testing…we are leave a lot behind…but we gain so much more. thanks for these words of encouragement…blessings to you~

  23. Such power and beauty in your words. Thank you for linking and for sharing your personal story of what it means for God to be Everything …

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